Angels Among Us 2024

Duffie Grace

Welcome to my team page in loving memory of James Carl Duffie, Sr., my dad.

My dad was once described as a gentlemen's gentleman which I find very fitting.  He lived a conservative, gentle life.  He was a devoted husband and father.  He loved sports, both playing it and being a spectator.   He was so honored when he was inducted into the Halifax County / South Boston Sports Hall of Fame in the community where he was born, raised, and lived his life.

In June of 2019, my still active and driving 89-year-old father had a few weird episodes of not remembering how to perform a couple of simple daily activities.  A trip to the emergency room where hopes were to learn of a UTI infection turned into an unexpected weeklong hospital stay.  The diagnosis was a brain tumor determined to be inoperable with even the biopsy being too risky to tackle.  They set expectations of six months to a year.

 The family decided to go to Duke for a second opinion.  We were lucky enough to see Dr. Allan Friedman, as we had learned of his great reputation.  He concurred inoperable brain tumor but was willing to biopsy to allow us to move forward with treatments, if desired. He let us know that treatment could slow progression but could not reverse or bring back mental capabilities already lost.   After family discussions, we opted to not do the biopsy or treatments as the benefits seemed less than the risks and outcomes.

As his daughter, I was struggling with that decision even though I knew it was the right decision.    Three months later after my dad had stopped communicating, I was at his bedside and he rolled over, looked me in the eye, and said “I can’t live like this.”    Those were the last words I heard from my dad.  As painful as they were to hear, they gave me peace knowing we had made the right decisions.

He handled this cancer and his final 3 months of life with the same conservativeness and grace that he lived his wonderful, long life.  Thus I named my team Duffie Grace.



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